Conquering Back-to-School Jitters
Back to school is just around the corner - I know, I know, it's already that time again! The back-to-school jitters are starting to sneak in for many kids and students. As I think about this exciting yet anxious time, I am reminded of a period when my 4-year-old son was afraid of monsters. No matter how many times I assured him that monsters aren't real, he couldn't shake off his fears. To him, monsters were as real as the fear they instilled in him.
Realizing that simply dismissing his fears wasn't enough, I decided to take a different approach. I understood that acknowledging and validating his feelings would make a significant difference. So, instead of telling him, "There's nothing to worry about. There are no monsters," I tried a new tactic. I told him, "Hey, if there are monsters, why don't we invite them to play?"
Curiosity sparked in my son's eyes as he listened intently. He giggled at the idea and looked up at me, intrigued, “Invite them to play?”
"Yeah! Next time you feel scared, just say, 'Hey monsters, come and play!'" I further explained.
With this simple exercise, we shifted our perspective. Instead of pushing away or resisting the anxiety, we embraced it and took the fear out of it. We turned the monsters into playmates. The power of imagination allowed us to transform his fears into something less intimidating. This approach helped my son cope with his anxiety and brought laughter into the equation.
We practiced this imaginative play often, using it as a tool to conquer his fear. The more we embraced the idea of monsters as playmates, the more he felt in control. He began to see the monsters as less threatening and more like silly friends who couldn't harm him. Slowly but surely, his fear started to dissipate.
As the first day of school approached, we faced a new set of jitters. However, armed with our newfound approach, we tackled them head-on. We acknowledged the nerves and talked openly about the uncertainties he felt. We reminded ourselves that just like the monsters, these jitters were temporary visitors, ready to be turned into playful companions.
With each passing day, my son's confidence grew. He faced the challenges of school with a newfound resilience. The once-dreaded back-to-school jitters were now seen as butterflies in his stomach, fluttering with anticipation rather than fear. This technique and many more helped me ease my son’s back-to-school worries that I’d like to share with you today!
Here are five techniques for conquering back-to-school jitters:
1. Create a Worry Jar: Find a clear jar and label it as the "Worry Jar." Encourage your child to write down (or you write it) their worries on paper and place them inside the jar. Explain that the jar will hold their worries for them, allowing them to let go of the burden. Set aside time to sit together to read through the worries and find positive solutions. As the jar fills up, your child will visually witness their worries diminishing, promoting a sense of relief and control. You could further throw the worries in the trash once you have discussed them.
2. Engage in Art Therapy: Art therapy can be a powerful tool for expressing emotions and reducing anxiety. Provide them with art supplies and a space where they can freely express themselves (somewhere you won’t be worried about a mess, haha). Art allows for self-expression without the need for words, allowing children to release their anxieties and fears. You can also try other tactile activities (using the hands) such as gardening, cooking, painting, etc., which have been scientifically proven to reduce human stress.
3. Teach Relaxation Techniques: Teaching relaxation techniques can empower children to manage their anxiety effectively. Breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, spending time in nature, and guided imagery are some strategies that can help calm their minds and bodies. Growing up, my mother always encouraged us to walk barefoot outside on the grass (now I love to do this with my kids), and recently new scientific data is coming out about its benefits! Something about being in nature is so energizing to the soul! Practice these techniques together and encourage your child to use them when they feel anxious.
4. Model confident and calm behavior: Remember that children learn through observation. When you accompany your child to school, demonstrate a calm and self-assured demeanor. Take deep breaths together, wear a smile, and exude enthusiasm! Communicate your excitement to see them after school and plan an enjoyable activity for when you pick them up. By showcasing your own confidence, you inspire them to think, "Why should I worry? My mom/dad has faith in me!" I always remind my kids that they can do hard things. I encourage them to feel the fear and do it anyway! True bravery lies in feeling scared but pushing forward nonetheless!
5. Collaborate with Teachers and School Staff: Encourage your child to ask for help if they need it and to communicate their needs to school staff. Share your child's anxiety and any relevant concerns with them. Regular communication with teachers can help ensure a consistent and supportive environment for your child.
Embracing my son’s anxieties and transforming them into opportunities for growth became a valuable lesson for both of us. It taught us the power of acceptance, imagination, and a little bit of laughter. And while the monsters may have disappeared from his thoughts, the memories of our playful approach remained, reminding us that we could overcome any obstacle together.
As you prepare for the back-to-school season, remember that acknowledging and validating your child's fears can go a long way. Find creative ways to address those fears, allowing them to feel empowered and in control. Embrace their anxieties and transform them into positive energy. With love, support, and a touch of imagination, you can help your child conquer their back-to-school jitters, just like we did with our playful monsters.
Until next time, take care of yourself!
Massoma
